Your Thoughts Aren’t Always Facts
We all interpret the world through a filter.
Experience.
Fear.
Expectations.
Assumptions.
Past relationships.
Things we’ve been told.
Things we’ve repeatedly told ourselves.
Those filters influence what we think is happening.
And what we think is happening influences how we feel and respond.
That’s the basic idea behind Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
Connecting the Dots
Imagine someone doesn’t return your text.
One person thinks:
“They’re probably busy.”
Another thinks:
“They’re angry with me.”
Another thinks:
“Nobody really wants me around.”
Same event.
Very different reactions.
CBT helps us slow the process down.
What happened?
What did you think?
What did you feel?
What did you do?
Was your interpretation accurate?
Is there another explanation?
Is the thought helping you respond effectively?
CBT Isn’t Positive Thinking
I don’t believe in pretending everything is wonderful.
Sometimes things aren’t wonderful.
CBT isn’t about replacing every uncomfortable thought with a cheerful one.
It’s about developing more accurate, balanced, flexible, and useful thinking.
And sometimes, after examining a thought, we discover:
“Actually, this concern may be realistic.”
That’s where another set of skills can become useful.
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